ShopDreamUp AI ArtDreamUp
Deviation Actions
Literature Text
Winter morning in late November,
Outdoors it is slowly getting light.
With a particular presentiment
I quickly jump out of the bed.
Amazed, I look out of the window,
There has happened something overnight.
The whole world has been changed
By winter's white magnificence.
Little flakes are dancing slowly
In front of the window, to and fro.
For hours I could watch them.
Oh, I love that so much.
Winter overcoat, scarf and cap
I pick out immediately.
Und then, full of joy, I run out
Into the snow-covered fields.
Silent, I walk all alone
Through the white winter wood.
Everything is so tranquil and peaceful,
And I am even not cold.
Slowly, I go always farther,
Feel that the world comes now to rest.
Fear and sorrow are falling from me,
And all is covered by the snow.
Outdoors it is slowly getting light.
With a particular presentiment
I quickly jump out of the bed.
Amazed, I look out of the window,
There has happened something overnight.
The whole world has been changed
By winter's white magnificence.
Little flakes are dancing slowly
In front of the window, to and fro.
For hours I could watch them.
Oh, I love that so much.
Winter overcoat, scarf and cap
I pick out immediately.
Und then, full of joy, I run out
Into the snow-covered fields.
Silent, I walk all alone
Through the white winter wood.
Everything is so tranquil and peaceful,
And I am even not cold.
Slowly, I go always farther,
Feel that the world comes now to rest.
Fear and sorrow are falling from me,
And all is covered by the snow.
Tip Jar The Strange Me
Support my work by contributing to my tip jar every month.
Things that are not in my gallery.
$2/month
Suggested Collections
Featured in Groups
The first snowfall in the winterly woods 
© 2012 - 2024 Malintra-Shadowmoon
Comments11
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Overall
Vision Originality
Technique ImpactI like your poem, but it unfortunately there's not much to say about it. There's no apparent symbolism, no narrative, no real underlying statement whatsoever. It's a visual piece. In that regard, I can only truly judge it by aesthetics. And it's pleasant. It's not particularly original, but if you're going to write about the winter AT ALL, you're never going to strike an original note, thanks to Robert Frost.
The thing is, the poem isn't bad. It's pleasant and your imagery is decent. Not brilliant by any means, but it works. This is simply one of those rare instances where I can't ACCURATELY judge because there's no proper gauge that doesn't run into a brick wall.
Your grammar isn't false, but there are some phrases that are worded oddly. "And I am even not cold" might work better as "And I am not even cold." "Slowly I go always farther" might be better as "I slowly go farther" (I'd drop the always. It sounds like you're trying to stuff an extra word in that sentence.)
That's about it. Decent poem.