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Literature Text
When I walk over the wooded hills at midnight
And the moon sketches my shadow
Smoothly on the moss –
When I raise my eyes to the firmament
And the Milky Way is reflected
In my mind like silver –
When the lucid fluxes of my heart
Flow upwards and fill the space –
The universe is trembling in joyful refreshment.
I whisper your name,
Draw you with my heart
And receive your light on the ether.
We rise over the horizon
Of profane and mortal narrowness
And dance to the sound of the heavenly harp ….
The midnight dance of eternity.
And the moon sketches my shadow
Smoothly on the moss –
When I raise my eyes to the firmament
And the Milky Way is reflected
In my mind like silver –
When the lucid fluxes of my heart
Flow upwards and fill the space –
The universe is trembling in joyful refreshment.
I whisper your name,
Draw you with my heart
And receive your light on the ether.
We rise over the horizon
Of profane and mortal narrowness
And dance to the sound of the heavenly harp ….
The midnight dance of eternity.
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Theme: Midnight Dance.
's September Tourney: Blue Round!Theme: Midnight Dance.
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Comments25
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I really like your first stanza - I feel like, with a little playing, it could be a poem all its own. I particularly like the verb you choose - the sketches my shadow - very original 
I would cut the third line of the third stanza; I think the flow there would be better without it, and it gets rid of one of the "then"s you begin two lines in a row with. I would also cut the "then" from the next stanza, and the last line altogether.
I would cut the third line of the third stanza; I think the flow there would be better without it, and it gets rid of one of the "then"s you begin two lines in a row with. I would also cut the "then" from the next stanza, and the last line altogether.